Wednesday, May 25, 2011

My Heart Is Breaking

I have to share this because if I don't I think I'll die.  Tonight my daughter calls me and when I tell her that I'll pick up the kids sometime Saturday morning to go yard sale-ing she tells me that I'm going to be mad at her.  I ask her why and she says that her boyfriend (who is almost my age) won't let me take the kids because I won't pay his rent.  He gets social security and welfare pays almost all his rent except for $43.  He won't pay it and they are two months behind already. 
I've got a problem with him anyway because I know he mistreats my daughter and if he isn't physically abusive (although I believe he is) I have heard him be emotionally abusive.  I know he is towards the kids as well but nobody will admit to it.  Social services has gone in to investigate and have decided that a complaint was unfounded so I'm pretty sure they're useless.
My fear is that the kids, who had a small get-a-way with us each week, are not going to get a break and will surely fail to thrive in their environment.  However, if I give in to this piece of crap and his blackmail, I will be in his power and I cannot and will not bow to this, for lack of a better word, jerk.
I think that I'll contact the commissioner of the DOSS in the morning and see what I can do.  My boyfriend told me they could be taken away and put in foster care and that I might never see them again.  That I don't mind if they are in a good, stable environment, but what if they get into a bad foster home?  I could never forgive myself for taking them from a bad place and putting them in a worse place.  I love these kids so much and my heart is breaking into a billion bits.  I know he'll let the kids come back to me as soon as he gets tired of them being around the house, but the boy is acting out in school again and the girl is gone to her friend's house whenever she can leave.  He's six and she's seven and it's not normal.   At least from what I remember of my own childhood.
I'm not related.  My daughter isn't married to this jerk, she's not their mother although they call her mom.  I have no legal recourse, so what do I do?
I know these blogs are supposed to be cheery and fun and crafty but tonight I just need to vent.  Anyone go through this? Any suggestions? How do I save these children from the ignorance of their father? 


  1. My heart breaks for you, As my daughter and grands are in a very similar situation. I tried the official route a few years ago and it came up with not enough to do anything with,In the end they hated me and took the children away from me for a long time I have tried talking to her, But she has been with him so long she is becoming just like him. I no longer have any contact with my grands, because of the hateful way they do things. Once they figured out how bad it hurt me to have the kids taken from me it became their favorite weapon of choice and I have been being beaten with it ever since.
    If there isn't some thing in it for him or her they can't be bothered.

    I sure wish I had an answer for you, If I did I could save my own grands.

    I will say a special prayer for you and yours and some day he will give us an answer. (SOON)

  2. CPS is useless.

    Do you know any of the childrens' blood relatives? Would they be willing to petition for custody?